Thoughts on Depression and Suicide

Depression and Suicide

I know some about depression and suicide, I have attempted 3 times in my life to commit suicide; and have suffered depression for many years. I thought I was alone in the world and had no one to talk to or understand me. I found years later that I am not alone, and neither are you. My upbringing wasn’t the best in the world, but it wasn’t the worst either. I’m not saying I am an expert, or know how everyone is feeling about these subjects, but I do know about depression and thoughts of suicide and trying to relieve the pain with drugs and alcohol.

We as a people need to know that it is not a bad thing to talk about depression and suicidal thoughts. We also need to understand that others will have these feelings, and it’s not just a phase. Or they are trying to get attention. I did not speak to anyone about my depression when I was sober, and when I was drunk no one believed me because I was so drunk. But my thoughts and feelings were true.  I just had to sober up and realize that I don’t have to face these feelings alone. Believe me, the sooner you cut down on drinking and using drugs to deal with life, the easier it will be. But I am not here to tell you what to do with yourself. I am just saying that once you learn to deal with yourself, life would get so much better for you.

Living in this modern world is a very challenging time for us. Our parents were most likely sent away for school and from what I hear it wasn’t all that great. When you got into trouble, you were punished by either getting hit with a ruler, or made to wear a dunce cap. And the way our grandparents were raised is much different.  Seeing their children treat their grandchildren that way must be heart breaking. So we as a young generation are caught between two worlds that are based on different values and ways of teaching and learning. In ourselves we feel the way of our ancestors, but the world wants us to do the exact opposite of what we feel is true and abide by their rules. That is causing conflict in us, and we have no way of showing that anger and frustration. We deal with our problems by numbing the pain with drugs and alcohol. I do not want my child to think that drugs and alcohol are the way to deal with life.

 Our parents and grandparents were told not to speak our native language. But today, we are trying to get it back, which is really hard to do seeing how everything here is written and spoken in English. So trying to find common grounds on talking about life and the ups and downs of it is just difficult. Our grandparents have a hard time with English, and our parents don’t talk about what happened to them unless they are impaired on some sort of substance. We as a new generation need to start speaking our minds and telling our children it’s OK to feel depressed, and sometimes those feelings bring on thoughts of suicide. But we do not have to act on those thoughts. The more we speak our minds and have an understanding person hearing what we have to say can really help us and open more doors into a more sober and healthy life style.

Depression is a very scary and taboo subject, but it needs to be addressed. Not just by the public faces of our leaders, but we as the people need to stop what we are doing and face the facts that we can and will get depressed. Our past has been so abused to the point where we are losing who we really are, and how our ancestors used to deal with mental health issues. But I would like to know how our grandparents and great grandparents dealt with mental health issues. And the only way to do that is to ask our elders what they remember. I love listening to the elders talk, even if it is in a language I don’t understand. The point is we just need to start the healing process.

Once the process has started, we can identify other mental health issues such as bipolar, anxiety, or some type of personality disorder to name a few. When we know what kind of issue is at hand, we will know how to diagnose and treat with either medicines, holistically, or both. It will not be easy dealing and figuring out what kinds and types of medicines will work, but it is a necessary process that needs to be taken.

Mental health issues ware out and can tear down a community, but that doesn’t always have to happen. Knowing what kinds of resources are available is a big part in the beginnings of healing. A starting point could be the health aides and nurses in the clinics, or the police department can be taught into looking for signs of mental health issues and can get the proper help someone would need to get better. That’s what I see that needs to be done in order for us to help ourselves into healing.

Many think that being diagnosed with a mental illness is a bad thing. It is not a bad thing, I just means your brain is wired differently then others. There are ways of treating mental illness, but alcohol and drugs aren't one of them. They only mask the problems, and make you think you are getting better, or don't need help. Alcohol is a depressant, even though the short term effects are laughter and having a good time. Use over time will bring down the person into a depressed state. Drugs such as marijuana only mask the depression symptoms, and will not help get anyone out of depression, no matter how much they smoke. Once you find out that you have a mental illness, you will start to see the world in a different light, and realize you are not alone.